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Post by wsprsonthewind on May 15, 2018 16:11:15 GMT -5
What changes in your thinking, body and mobility have you began to notice in the last few years?
I've noticed things hurt much worse and take longer to heal. Loss of interest in things I used to enjoy. More aware of morality. Dread of losing my parents. Feeling as if I'll have no-one once my parents are gone.
This is just a few I've noticed.
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austin
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Post by austin on May 15, 2018 17:30:53 GMT -5
I have been without family for 7 years now and it isn't any fun. My heart condition got far worse after I lost Mom and then my precious dogs. I can't do nearly as much as before and I can't be out in the heat. The other seasons work better for me.
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Post by wsprsonthewind on May 15, 2018 19:20:54 GMT -5
I agree with you about the heat. I do not like summer at all.
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austin
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Post by austin on May 16, 2018 11:48:44 GMT -5
I am not as patient as I was when I was younger
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Post by april67 on May 17, 2018 7:07:55 GMT -5
The older I get, the less I like the heat.
Some pains I used to not have.
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Post by Deleted on May 17, 2018 7:38:02 GMT -5
I'm the opposite, the older I get, the more I don't like the cold..
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Post by wsprsonthewind on May 18, 2018 15:01:38 GMT -5
I would prefer cool weather. We do get all the seasons here in Tennessee. They may not come in the normal order but we get them. It might be 80° and snow tomorrow . Things kinda go crazy around here when the seasons are trying to change.
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Post by wsprsonthewind on May 18, 2018 15:03:28 GMT -5
I am not as patient as I was when I was younger I am the opposite on that one. I am more mellow and I pick my battles where 20 years ago I would get in somebody's face for the slightest little thing . I still have a quick temper at times but the instances are few and far between now.
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austin
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Post by austin on May 18, 2018 15:33:55 GMT -5
I don't lose my temper or fight with anyone but I get impatient when things go wrong. And I find stupid more annoying than when I was younger. Maybe I should say I get more frustrated than impatient.
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Post by Deleted on May 21, 2018 16:25:23 GMT -5
I'm the opposite, the older I get, the more I don't like the cold.. Me to
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Post by wsprsonthewind on May 25, 2018 6:16:49 GMT -5
Whisper, could you please extrapolate on your statement that as you grow older you think more about your morality? TY Yes, I can. I never thought of dying or losing my parents when I was younger, but now my thought pattern has shifted and I think about it more. I feel that once they are gone then I will be utterly and totally alone. It's scary to think about facing the day that I won't have them. I selfishly wish that I would go before them so I wouldn't have to go through the pain but I know that would be hard to put them through that if that happened. I'm not sure that you can fully understand where I'm coming from if you aren't in your mid-life season. It's like until the last five years I was on the young side of life. Now I've reached a peak and it seems that I'm going down the other side. More years behind me than I have left in other words.
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austin
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Post by austin on May 25, 2018 10:59:41 GMT -5
Whispers, you are so strong. It is horrible when you have no family. Our family used to very large and now it's just me. But you can do it. One day at a time. And your very strong faith will get you through when the time comes. Hopefully, that is still a long time from now.
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Post by wsprsonthewind on May 26, 2018 10:27:32 GMT -5
ustin,
You bring up another good point about that when you say that I'm very strong. I get tired of being strong and carrying the world on my shoulders.
I have also seen a quote on Facebook about how the older you get the more anxiety you get because you've been through so much at this point that you just can't take in and process anymore. And of course working in the mental health field that is a very good point. It's the mental equivalent of the straw that broke the camel's back. I have seen that time and time again in people as they get older.
Sometimes being strong is not a choice.
And I hope nobody takes this topic as me being Sinister or depressed because I'm not. But I've also never been at this stage in my life before and evidently this is something that older people just don't talk to younger people about so it's kind of nice to hear or get some feedback from people but maybe around my age has.
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austin
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Post by austin on May 26, 2018 16:25:34 GMT -5
Whispers, I have quite a few years on you and it is not a happy time as you lose family, beloved pets, see your health deteriorate, and a lot of days you feel like you can't go on. Somehow you do. It gets very lonely. You know me. You know that I was rushed to the ER when my defib shocked me 7 times in 30 minutes and I thought I was dying. I lost my most precious gift, My Rain Dancer, 5 days later. It nearly killed me. For over a year I thought I was going to die because of my heart. It took me over a year to accept that I was going to be okay but I still cry almost daily over Nakota and Rain. And yes, I have Austin now and he makes my world bearable.
But I can no longer do many of the things I used to do. That includes fun things and work around the house. The hardest part is how frustrating it gets when you can't find good handy men to do the work that you can't do.
And there is the financial situation for many people but seniors have it rough. No raises ever. Frustration at not being able to work and knowing how much some extra income would make things better.
Losing the ability to travel is very difficult for a lot of people.
And sadly, when you can't afford to do things you used to do, you lose your friends because of it and wonder if they really are friends.
As another member has said, sometimes a warm smile is the only good thing that happens to some people so share your smile. So true.
Some of my older friends who have recently lost spouses are having a rough time not knowing how to do things they never had to do before. My neighbor has never had to cut grass or put gas in her car, or wash her car and she is quite lost.
A lot of seniors don't eat well because they don't feel like cooking for one.
Is there any way to prevent all of this from happening? It's doubtful. You can never prepare for having no family. And it is very difficult to watch families at war when so many are suffering from having no one to turn to.
Losing medical professionals you trust is very depressing and overwhelming for some seniors.
And yes, people do get tired of being strong, but you have no choice. It's survival or just giving up.
Another hard thing for people is how different the world is. I grew up in a very safe place that is now a nightmare. Just a few blocks from here this week, a couple people were having a shootout. Who got killed? An innocent woman at a gas station for being in the wrong place between the warring shooters. Seeing the world change so drastically is overwhelming.
I hope this explains some of what happens.
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Post by wsprsonthewind on May 26, 2018 18:16:24 GMT -5
You know that brings up another good point. The suicide rate among the elderly is very high. This is understandable when all of the things you described above takes place. Loss of family members, loss of income, loss of lifestyle, deteriorating health, etc.
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kpthatsme
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Post by kpthatsme on May 27, 2018 16:19:17 GMT -5
I lost my dad 34 years ago and my mom 2 years ago. I do, however, have a couple of brothers and a sister - all younger and all live scattered about. My brothers live about 50 miles away lol each in a different direction. My sister lives in Florida. I also have my son and my 2 granddaughters. So I consider myself lucky. I have noticed things as I have gotten older. I love the hot weather but don't tolerate it as I used to. I also don't bounce back from say an illness as I once did. I move a lot slower than I used to but I still manage to get done what I need to do - it just takes me a bit longer. I too, live in an area that I really don't like. After my mom passed a way, I moved in with my son, his girlfriend and my 2 granddaughters (9 months and 3 1/2) This area is a lot different than where I had lived for most of my life. Chicago has a horrible problem with shootings and now I'm a bit closer to it than I'm comfortable with. We are currently looking into buying a house. And then the whole "I'm not a big fan of change" will start all over again. So in my case, I do what I have to do and try really hard to put a big smile on my face and move along because there are not too many alternatives. I always laugh because my age doesn't bother me - but my son's does! LOL
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austin
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Post by austin on May 27, 2018 18:55:22 GMT -5
Another change is that I am more serious than when I was younger. Not as easy going. People I go out to dinner with are more serious. No joking and laughing. Fortunately I have a dog that makes me smile and laugh.
I agree with KP that it takes longer to do things that were easy before, but because of my heart, there are things I just can't do and that is frustrating.
I never want to have my defib shock me again. That was the most horrible experience. I don't know how people live through it when they get 20 or 30 shocks.
Then again, isn't today's technology amazing?
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austin
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Post by austin on May 30, 2018 14:09:47 GMT -5
Another difficult thing seniors deal with is losing their Independence if they lose the ability to drive. They don't want to rely on others when they were used to doing things for themselves. It is very difficult. I watched my Mother go through this and it was terrible for her.
And one of the biggest changes after you lose your parents and your spouse is not feeling needed any more. Your purpose seems to be gone and a lot of people have a real problem with getting through it.
Finding a new focus sometimes seems impossible especially if they have been a care giver to a sick loved one.
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Post by wsprsonthewind on May 30, 2018 15:17:03 GMT -5
Yes,I agree. I forget that I'm not 20 anymore. I usually remember when I'm falling off the ladder or going to the chiropractor.
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austin
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Post by austin on Jun 1, 2018 15:08:26 GMT -5
For some reason seniors do seem to fall more often. Maybe from medicines or loss of balance. Vertigo seems to affect older people more than younger ones.
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Post by april67 on Jun 2, 2018 4:26:27 GMT -5
True about falls. I've even had some falls. Has not happened for a good while now though & I'm thankful.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 2, 2018 12:42:18 GMT -5
I almost fell during this winter, ice was under the snow but i caught myself😎
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austin
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Post by austin on Jun 2, 2018 13:39:14 GMT -5
I have had three rotator cuff surgeries from falling on ice. Since I am retired now I don't go out when it's icy.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 9, 2018 14:31:16 GMT -5
Oh wow, that’s understandable
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Post by wsprsonthewind on Jun 16, 2018 18:04:41 GMT -5
Getting old is not for sissies.
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Post by april67 on Jun 20, 2018 5:32:52 GMT -5
I almost fell during this winter, ice was under the snow but i caught myself😎 I'm glad you caught yourself & didn't fall. Falls are scary even if one doesn't get hurt.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2018 15:09:40 GMT -5
Right, so true
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Post by wsprsonthewind on Jul 14, 2018 22:31:44 GMT -5
Hey everybody. I'm just checking in. Life has been a little crazy the last couple of weeks so I've not had time to do much of anything.
What is new with everyone here?
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austin
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Post by austin on Jul 14, 2018 22:42:01 GMT -5
I am glad to see you here again. I have missed you. Are you all mended? Any lasting effects?
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Post by wsprsonthewind on Aug 4, 2018 13:10:04 GMT -5
Getting older for me has left me not sweating the small things in life.
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